Last evening I took myself out on a date! Yep…me with me. I wanted to be selfish, well, not actually. I simply wanted to enjoy the company of myself and feel into my experience without sharing it with another. I wanted to be intimate with me, more present for me in what I was doing and how I was feeling. I think you get the picture. It seemed self-observation would be easier (not necessarily easy) when in the company of myself.
What did I do? A painting class! I had no idea what I was to paint or what was going to happen, I was simply excited to do this activity and discover what it had to offer me in the way of creative expression. I had no expectations of the class or of my ability! What a relief.
Come to find out…I was going to be a Van Gogh imitator. What!?!?! Van Gogh. Geese…I mean, who do I think I am! LOL. So, the instructor began our 2-hour adventure and I began to put brush to paint to canvas. And well…it started out pretty good I thought. Then eventually my attention to the teacher dwindled and my own inner explorer took over. I was half laughing and half crying (not literally) at how all my paints looked an absolute mess compared to the teacher’s perfect pallet – SO NEAT AND ORDERLY! No way could I ever do that! And my painting was veering away from that of Van Gogh AND the teacher! Oh my!!! And I watched as my mind began to criticize my work – it didn’t like my color selection, it didn’t like the placement, it didn’t think I was doing a good job. I watched and witnessed and observed all kinds of commentary that it had! However…I didn’t let it deter me and allowed my Soul to calm it down, relaxing it so I could proceed and enjoy my creation…but then…
As the paintings of each in the class progressed, we all started to look at each other’s paintings, commenting on how each others were beautiful and how lacking our own were. There was a feeling of need amongst most, if not all, to compliment the other’s work. I found myself fully participating in this exchange. It wasn’t until today did I really begin reflecting on my experience.
In retrospect – there are a couple fascinating points to consider.
1. We can celebrate each other without making the outcome be the reason for the celebration. The mere fact that each of us where willing to allow our creative spark to shine – in any way IT wanted to – IS the point! How often do we miss this?
2. Comparing diminished the inner journey of each of us as creative beings. Comparing is a subtle (and not so subtle) way of judging! Who’s the critic? Does it really help our Light shine or does it diminish us? Let’s leave comparing to the accountants…and let’s even call that evaluation. Looking outside the self for validation and approval will never be enough! Instead, look within and validate and approve the self first – that way any other’s commentary can be a choice for you to accept or not.
And remember, we are all EVOLVING beings.
3. We all shine differently! We are all unique expressions of the Divine Light! And as such, I’ll never be a Van Gogh or a Susie or a Tom or any other person on the planet, and I don’t want to be! Phew…thank goodness I don’t have to be, because I can’t no matter how hard I try! So, none of us are here to be other than who we are! Celebrate all that you ARE and creatively express YOU WITHOUT comparing or judging yourself OR the other!
So – here’s a picture of my Masterpiece!
Thank you for my uniqueness! Please assist me in each moment to listen to my creative heart and honor Its wisdom, recognizing it will be different than everyone else’s and that is ok. Teach me how to let the voice of my Heart joyfully express without any mental commentary of self judgment and comparison.
And blessed be. And so it is.
Take a moment to see where your mind is judging you, in ANY area of your life – it may look like a criticism about your body, cooking, knowledge, health, lifestyle, etc. – and ask Love to wrap it’s loving arms around that thought and gently lift its heavy burden from you so you may see with the eyes of innocence upon yourself and your creations and rest in the joy of expression and self discovery…whatever that may be.
I love you deeply!